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You might have heard the expression “female-led relationships”.
What exactly is a female-led relationship? Is it just a relationship where the woman is the one wearing the pants?
This article will explore what female-led relationships look like and what they mean to the people involved.
This article will help you to understand if you are in a male-led relationship.
Understanding Female-Led Relationships
A lot of confusion surrounds what constitutes a female-led relationship (or FLR). This is due to the fact that there are many types of FLRs, with dynamics that can range from mild interactions up to extreme interactions.
It is important to understand what a female-led relationship is not, and how it differs from the traditional male-led relationship.
A FLR is a great option for women. However, many people wonder why men prefer this type relationship.
Traditional relationships give men all power and authority over their partners, so why shouldn’t they resist these changes in dynamics.
A FLR can offer many benefits to men. One example is:
Some men do not like the pressure of having to make difficult decisions alone. This allows men to be more relaxed with their partner by letting go of authority
Men now appreciate and understand their partner’s worth more than ever before, unlike previous generations. Men see their partners as equals, rather than less than them. This gives rise to the natural feeling that they are entitled to equal participation in the relationship.
Some men might prefer to be the breadwinner because of their personal preferences or personality. Some men prefer to take on the traditional feminine role of caring for the family, cooking and cleaning. These men would be happy to partner with women who can do the same.
Female-led relationships are less stressful because both partners have at least equal input in major decisions. This leads to a happier life for the man.
The overall benefits of female-led relationships
Although there are some advantages that are exclusive to women in female-led relationships, both men and women can still benefit from them. Both partners can also enjoy the overall benefits of these types of relationships.
1. Transparent Communication
Transparency and honesty are the cornerstones of female-led relationships. These relationships require both partners to be open-minded and willing to adjust to each other’s needs.
Traditional relationships are rigid and do not allow for growth and evolution. Female-led relationships, on the other hand, allow both partners to express their needs and desires.
2. Family-First Decisions
If one person is the sole decision-maker in a relationship, it can lead to toxic and unhealthy dynamics in which the person neglects to prioritize the happiness and well-being of others.
Traditional male-led relationships can fall into the trap of the man becoming so focused on himself that they make poor and destructive decisions for their family.
A relationship that is based on discussion and communication will result in better decisions for the whole family.
3. There is less pressure on defined roles
There are two archetypes of the traditional man archetype: masculine, strong and emotionally withdrawn. The traditional woman archetype is timid, family-first and caring.
These traditional roles are problematic because we may not always fit in and can feel pressured into being people we aren’t.
Female-led relationships enable people to play the roles that they were born to, such as a man cooking dinner and raising children or a woman being the breadwinner.
4. More Sex
Sex, which is one of the most important aspects of a relationship and a guarantee for improvement in a female-led relationship, is also guaranteed to improve.
The woman feels empowered, respected, and the husband has a better appreciation for his partner’s worth and value.
Combining both of these will result in each partner wanting their partner more. This will make sex more enjoyable for both partners.
There are 4 types of female-led relationships
There are many different types of female-led relationships. Male-led relationships are usually grouped into one type, where the man holds most of the authority and power. However, female-led relationships range from mild to severe.
These are the types of FLRs.
1. Lower Level FLR
It’s difficult to label a lower-level female-led relationship “female led” because it doesn’t necessarily involve a woman leading the relationship.
The FLR at the lower levels describes a relationship where the man and woman are almost equal.
The merits of each partner’s arguments are considered. Before any decision can be made, there must be mutual consent.
These relationships are not for women who think they have power over their partner, or that they can make decisions on their own.
2. Moderate Level FLR
The moderate level FLR is the next level. In this level, the woman may have some authority over her man, but she may not always be able to exercise it.
A lower-level FLR and a moderate FLR are largely different in mentality. In a lower FLR, the woman understands that although she has an equal voice, she doesn’t have a greater role in the relationship than her partner.
A moderate FLR means that the woman believes she has more control over certain parts of the relationship than she does others, even though she may not act upon it.
Although it may seem like a minor difference, this can make a huge impact on the woman’s self-worth, self-confidence and overall happiness in the relationship.
3. FLR at a Higher Level
A relationship at the higher level FLR means that it is established that the woman is the authority figure.
This type of relationship can be best understood by comparing it with the typical male-led relationship. Switching the gender roles will allow you to see how the women become the head of the household and the authority figure in the home.
The income of the family is mainly dependent on the women, while the men focus on maintaining the house’s wellbeing, cleaning up, cooking and general household maintenance.
The dominant female force in the bedroom may be the woman. The man usually has a normal and happy relationship with his partner, aside from the “female” responsibilities of child care and home.
4. Extreme FLR
The extreme FLR type is the best example of female authority in a male-led relationship.
This FLR is where the woman assumes the absolute authority of the man, making all decisions and controlling every aspect in his life.
The woman expects the best from her partner and should be willing to do whatever she asks.
Extreme FLRs could be considered dysfunctional relationships. This is because they are more sexually driven than any other.
Extreme FLRs are characterized by a specific personality type: a woman who feels the need to be in control and powerful, and a man who is subservient and submissive.
There are many ways a female-led relationship can go wrong
We’ve already discussed the benefits and advantages of a female-led relationship. However, FLRs can sometimes not be ideal for both parties.
Sometimes, one partner might try to force a relationship that the other is not comfortable with. This could lead to a premature end of the relationship. These are just a few ways FLRs can go sour:
1. The Man Might Not Like It
Expectation: Two people meet and start dating and fall in love.
The woman wants to create a foundation for a female-led relationship, while the man will happily say yes to satisfy his partner. They both play their roles well and live happily ever after.
Reality: Although a man may initially agree with what a woman wants, it doesn’t necessarily mean that he will be happy with it.
A woman might be more progressive and liberal than her male partner and may have different expectations about what a man should do.
FLRs are problematic because men are programmed by nature to provide for their partners. They must overcome feelings of inadequacy or worthlessness if they don’t provide in the way they were taught.
To adjust to a woman, a significant amount of growth is needed from the man. However, the woman should also attempt to find the middle.
In the end, both parties must reach a compromise before they can agree on the type of FLR that is best for them.
2. Society Might Judge You
Expectation: A female-led relationship is formed between two people. The traditional gender roles of breadwinner and caretaker are reversed.
Everybody around you, your family, friends and even strangers on street, is simply happy that it’s you who are happy.
Reality: Even though you and your partner have achieved the ideal balance to maximize your happiness within a female-led relationship, it doesn’t necessarily mean that everyone will be equally accepting.
Both partners will feel pressured by others. The man will feel less manly because he’s not the main breadwinner and the woman will feel guilty for not being home with the children.
Both of you will have to question your decisions and decide if you are doing the right thing for your children as well.
Although this can be difficult to resolve, it is the most important test of your relationship.
You can ignore the expectations of others and be open to the possibility of long-term happiness together.
3. You might end up mothering your partner
Expectation: A woman may seek a FLR of moderate, high, or extreme levels. This means that you are more powerful than your man and regularly exercise it.
You desire to be in control of many aspects of your partner’s family life.
Reality: There are situations in which the FLR man ends up losing most of his power and authority, in which case the FLR woman ends up losing all of her power.
Instead of being the man who works to your satisfaction, he becomes a former version of himself, redefining both his role as your son as well as yours as his mother.
You would be a mother to certain personality types if you took all authority and power from your male partner.
All romantic and sexual desires would soon fall off the cliff and there may not be a way back.
Guidelines for Making Female-Led Relationships Work
Maintaining the happiness and cooperation in a female-led relationship is not as easy as a traditional male-led one. These are the essential guidelines that you and your partner should follow.
You must be transparent and honest with your partner. This will allow them to adjust as necessary and you can feel heard.
Understanding Your Roles and Lines. Happiness requires that both partners feel comfortable with their setup. Both you and your partner must be able to accept and understand each other’s expectations and roles.
Reexamine Your Situation Periodically. You may not always know the right thing, nor will your partner. You should meet up with your partner for an honest, open discussion about your happiness and comfort every so often.
Do not judge anyone else: Let other people’s opinions and feelings determine how you feel about each other. Your happiness is yours. You can do what you want, as long as your partner is satisfied.
Never forget the love: FLRs often get caught up in the trap of focusing more on their roles than what they are doing for one another. Always put love first.
Be aware of abuse: No matter the type of relationship, abuse is always a danger. You must ensure that you are not making a negative use of the power you have granted each other.
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A relationship coach can provide valuable advice if you need it.
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