Is it time for you shouldn’t break up?
This is a huge, emotional decision that will impact your life and the lives of others.
It could be the best decision that you have ever made.
It could be worse.
This article will discuss 19 reasons why you should end a relationship. Then, we’ll talk about 8 reasons why it’s not.
Hopefully, by the end, you will be better informed about what actions to take.
15 reasons to end a relationship
1) You are not acting for yourself and you shouldn’t break up
It is not necessary to examine your partner to determine if your relationship works. Instead, look at yourself.
Are you acting like your normal self or are you acting crazy and emotional? Are you crazy or emotional? Do you worry about what your partner will think?
The best relationships are those where you can be yourself.
you shouldn’t break up You won’t be happy if you aren’t careful about how you behave around your partner.
Here are 7 signs you might not be comfortable with your partner.
Your partner is noticing that you are tiptoeing around and trying to hide things.
You are constantly watching your words and actions, worrying about your partner’s opinions.
When your partner is around, you feel anxious and frustrated. This cloud lifts you even if you aren’t there.
You are worried about being judged.
You shouldn’t look at your partner for longer than five seconds.
It is impossible to say what you mean.
They don’t trust you: You just have this constant feeling in the pit of your stomach that something is not right.
Andrea Bonior, Ph.D. says that apologizing and being true to yourself is a sign of a controlling relationship.
If you have to constantly apologize to your partner about who you are, it is a warning sign that you should be taken seriously. Do you feel like you’re not good enough? Does your partner feel that they are not up to the task? This is an indication of a controlling relationship if taken to its extreme.
Don’t get me wrong. There is a compromise in almost every relationship, especially when it comes to preferences and interests.
You might, for example, have different preferences in restaurants.
This is normal and is not usually the reason for the end of a relationship, except if there are many.
you shouldn’t break upIt’s almost impossible to have a strong, healthy relationship if you’re willing to compromise your core values and your personal goals.
If you don’t feel free to be yourself in the relationship, it may be time to end the relationship.
2) They make you feel like sh*t and put you down.
If you feel bad around them and they are lowering your self-esteem by making subtle, untried statements, it is a sign that the relationship is not working for you.
It is never fun to receive an insulting comment.
Although you might try to ignore the comment, a part of it could stick and cause you to worry about what is really “wrong.”
This is common in a relationship that involves a narcissist. They enjoy the control and feel that they can control you.
You don’t want them to mix these backhanded compliments and “love bombs”, which are actions of affection intended to make you feel loved.
Rhoberta Shaler is a relationship love doctor who describes these people as “hijacks” as they “hijack relationships to their own purposes while relentlessly scavenging power, status, and control.”
These are questions to ask your partner to determine if they are a “hijack”.
Is it possible to be wrong even when you believe what you are saying is true?
Do you ever try to please everyone, but it doesn’t seem to be enough?
Is your partner always able to justify their actions, even when they are clearly wrong or outlandish?
Are you always being taken advantage of by your partner?
you shouldn’t break up If you answered yes to any of these questions, it may be time to move on to better emotional health.
You are slowly being taken advantage of by a toxic partner. You might be subject to hurtful comments, gentle nudges or comments that sap your confidence.
You can’t complain about small actions.
3) You are hiding them from your family and friends
It is not something you should take lightly when introducing your family and friends. It is a huge step.
For most people, winning over their partner’s family is just as important as winning over their own.
Each relationship is unique and there is no one right time.
If you have been together for some time and have not introduced them to your inner circle or vice versa then it’s time to do something.
Susan Winter, a relationship expert, says that “gaining access into your partner’s inner circle demonstrates their commitment”.
If you don’t feel able to introduce them to your friends or family, it is important to step back and examine why.
Here’s a tweet that summarizes how you might feel.
I waited three years before introducing my ex-boyfriend to my mom. My current boyfriend met my entire family within the first month of our dating. People who say “I need time” really mean “I don’t know about you”, and that is okay. But when you know, you’ll know. You know what?
— Eleanor (@b444mbi) May 31, 2018
However, if they don’t make an effort to get to understand you after you’ve introduced them to your family, it could indicate that they aren’t invested in the relationship.
4) They aren’t liked by your family and friends
If your partner is someone you love, it might be time to step back and examine why.
When you are too close to the situation, outside perspectives can offer a lot more insight.
There are usually good reasons why your loved ones don’t like the person that you’re dating.
Their main intention is to take care of you. You might even be blinded in love.
If your family and friends are warning you about your relationship, that’s a huge red flag.
You might need to take a step back and evaluate why this is the case. It’s possible that they are not the right person to be with you.
Nicole Richardson, a marriage counselor, says it is important to be aware of if your family holds your best intentions.
“If we have healthy families and we know our family has the best intentions, then their criticism is something to be aware of…If we have toxic or judgmental families, they might be concerned about their own personal interests, and that could nullify their opinions.”
5) You don’t appreciate one another anymore
You don’t have to be in a relationship to make money or feel a strong attachment.
But, it is important to feel appreciated. If you don’t feel appreciated, alarm bells should sound.
For men, being appreciated is often the difference between “like” and “love”, especially for men.
Let me tell you what I mean.
Your guy will love your independence and strength, I’m not going to lie. He still wants to feel valued and valuable — not disposable!
you shouldn’t break upMen have an inherent desire to find something “greater” than love and sex. This is why even though they may have the “perfect girlfriend” and “perfect wife”, many men are still unhappy and constantly search for someone else.
6) you shouldn’t break upThey can’t help but feel mean to you
We’ve discussed your partner being mean to yourself, but it is also important to think about if your partner is being mean to you.
Do you want to control them? Do you play games to manipulate them? Are you innately aware that they love and care for you more than you do?
If you put someone down or take advantage of them, it is obvious that they don’t really like you.
This type of unbalanced relationship can be very damaging for both parties.
Sometimes you have to let go to allow someone else to treat them better.
Megan Fleming is a New York City-based psychologist, sex therapist and psychotherapist. If you are blaming your partner when they have caused the problem, it’s a sign you’re treating them poorly.
“It is a sign of weakness if you blame others instead of taking responsibility for your problems… Men and women who blame believe the other person is the problem.”
7) Your relationship is moving faster than you think
You’ve decided to move in together, but you aren’t sure you want to. You have met the family but never wanted to move in the first place.
These could be signals that you are not interested in being in the relationship.
It might be convenient for you right now, but if it isn’t, you must identify what is holding you back.
Relationships grow over time, you shouldn’t break up whether it’s through living together, marriage, or starting a family.
If you deny your partner these things, the relationship will be strained and frustrating.
Perhaps you both don’t want to be married or have a family. It’s okay to be open and honest about your feelings.
April Masin is a relationship and etiquette expert. If you are in a serious relationship you must have some important conversations. If you don’t have those conversations it’s likely that things move too quickly (or that there’s not much to the future).
Talk about your hopes, dreams, past, debt, feelings, children, families, religion and other issues. If you don’t talk, they can become a problem later and could be a deal breaker.
You need to take a step back, and consider whether you wish for this relationship ever to move forward. You can move slowly but you must move in a positive direction.
8) You are experiencing constant anxiety about your relationship.
you shouldn’t break up Anxiety about romantic relationships is known as relationship anxiety. Instead of feeling content in a relationship, one doubts their love and is constantly unhappy.
Dr. Amanda Zayde is a Montefiore Medical Center clinical psychologist. She told NBC that while some forms of relationship anxiety are normal, it can become a problem when it becomes excessive.
“It’s important to remember that every person has some level of relationship anxiety.
If it’s normal for people to be concerned about their relationships, how can they know if there is really a problem?
These are some questions you should ask yourself.
Do you question their behavior when you’re not there?
Do you doubt their love for you?
Do you doubt yourself or the value of your relationship?
This could indicate that the relationship is not working if you cannot stop thinking in these three different ways.
When a couple is in a strong relationship, it’s normal to not doubt their love for one another.
Relationship anxiety is when two people aren’t in love.
While you are constantly trying to please your partner by putting in the effort, they don’t do the same for you.
You feel emotionally drained because of the negative energy in the relationship.
It is simple:
You should feel confident in your relationship you shouldn’t break up if you are with someone you love.
If you are not on the same page it is a sign that things might not be working out and that it may be time for a breakup.
9) Intimacy and sex are not encouraged
Are you feeling disconnected from your partner? Do you feel disconnected from your physical connection?
This is a very common problem in a relationship, but it does not always have to end the relationship.
A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that the honeymoon phase of a new relationship’s sexual relationship tends to last for about 2 to 3 years. Things can get difficult after that.
Women can improve their physical connection with their husbands by getting inside their heads.
What does he want from you when it comes to intimacy and sex?
Men don’t want women who are a firecracker in bed. A woman with a large chest and a flat stomach.
He wants to be recognized for his talents. He wants to feel that he is doing his job as a man.
10) You continue to take a break
You might need to reassess your relationship if you keep getting apart and then get back together.
You may think that things will improve, but then you find the same old problems popping up again and again.
You might have messed things up in your relationship or they may have done something wrong.
It doesn’t matter what it may be, if you keep reliving the same fights it could indicate that you are not capable of overcoming certain issues.
You have a reason for taking these breaks.
You need to stop and ask yourself if there has been any significant change.
11) You talk about “when” you think the relationship will be better.
Both of you are convinced that your relationship will improve, but only “when” you are more financially secure or “when they are less stressed at work.
People “hope” their partner will change but it is not always the case.
It is impossible you shouldn’t break up to expect someone else to change after they reach certain milestones.
It might happen. But if you hold on to these things and they are the only thing keeping you together, it could you shouldn’t break upartner not to change his/her values or personality if you wait.
It can be very difficult to make a change in your personality.
You might need to let go if you don’t like what they do.
Your relationship should be based on your current feelings about the present. You might not be content in the present if you are always looking ahead.
12) you shouldn’t break up You are always thinking of hooking up with others
It’s normal to occasionally think of hooking up. But if you find it impossible to stop picturing yourself with another person, it could indicate that your relationship is becoming a bit boring.
It’s important to remember that even the best relationships can get a bit old.
A study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that the sexual honeymoon phase of new relationships lasts about 2 to 3 years.
“While there’s a honeymoon phase for long-term couples that lasts about two to three decades, during which couples experience high levels of sexual satisfaction, it starts to decline after that.”
You can switch up your romance or have a nice, old-fashioned talk about sex.
If you are still unable to stop thinking about and sleeping with other people or if your partner is not sexually excitable, it could indicate that you’re in a relationship that’s already halfway over.
13) They are way too dependent on you – or they are just too needy
Are they trying to stop you from visiting your friends? Do they want to dictate your time? you shouldn’t break up Are they unable to trust you when you are not there? Are they willing to spend every moment of every day with you?
It is possible to become too attached and clingy for what may appear romantic and lovey-dovey.
Even if you are in a relationship, you should be able to live your life as you wish. It’s not cool to control someone else’s life.
If your world revolves around them, or they control you in any way possible, this could indicate a toxic relationship.
Tracey Steinberg, a New York-based dating expert, says that if your partner seems clingy it could indicate that they are more interested than you in them.
Let’s face it, Bradley Cooper could text you ten times and you would be sending it everywhere. However, it can seem very, very annoying if it comes from someone you don’t care as much about.”
14) You shouldn’t break up-Trust is not possible
They can’t be trusted in what they say or do. You can’t trust what they say, even if they claim they’re going out with friends.
They could have a secret relationship, you never know.
Without trust, a relationship cannot grow. Your mind will continue to wander in all directions, wondering what others are doing behind you.
Psychology Today’s Rob Pascale, Ph.D. explains that trust is a key component of a successful relationship.
“Trust is one of the keystones of any relationship–without it two people cannot be comfortable with each other and the relationship lacks stability.”
15) They have cheated on your
Most people believe that if their partner cheats, they will walk out of a relationship without a second thought.
We all know this is not an easy task.
You’ve already built an emotional connection in a long-term partnership. It’s difficult to walk away from something that intense.
However, there are many people who walk away from a partner that cheats on them. Most would agree that this was the right decision.
If you are wondering if your partner should be divorced because they have cheated on you, these are three questions you might want to ask:
Are they even aware of the pain they caused? Are they even aware of how they have hurt you? Do they really regret what they did?
Are you aware of the extent of their cheating? Are they being honest about their cheating?
Are you able to move on? Will the memory of their cheating always haunt you? Are you able to trust them again?
Is it worth saving a relationship? Is it worth saving the relationship? Or should we just move on?
These questions will help you determine if your relationship is worth saving.